2017 is the year of the Rooster according to the Chinese Zodiac – or, more specifically the female fire chicken.

I like reading about the Zodiac and checking in on my horoscope from time to time just for fun. It’s entertaining both when the horoscope is eerily accurate and when it’s dead wrong. For example, I was born in the year of the Rabbit (1987). People who are Rabbits are supposed to be gentle, compassionate and like to avoid getting into arguments. That’s me for sure. On the flip side, Rabbits are also meant to be homebodies who aren’t quick to anger. That couldn’t be further from who I am. I have to get away from the house at least once every day or I go stir crazy. And if you want to know how quick I am to anger, just make me drop something or tell me the vending machine is out of Coke Zero – hoo boy.

I decided to look up the year of the Rooster (or lady fire chicken) to see how a Rabbit like me was destined to fair in 2017. I think the general world population agrees that 2016 was crappy, so I was hoping I would see something positive and inspiring; something to get me out of my funk.

Here’s what I found:

There’s a good chance I’m going to lose my job.

Or, I might be offered a new position, but I shouldn’t take it. It’ll be too much pressure, and I’ll fail which brings me back to unemployment.

I can expect to be vilified at work.

I’m exceptionally vulnerable to a lawsuit.

The Flaming Chicken Goddess brings fertility – naturally – so it is a good year to have a baby. However, I better not get pregnant until after May, or else the baby and I will clash for life. Hashtag frenemies. I imagine a Damian situation.

I’ll likely to fall victim to some kind of physical accident this year, resulting in a bone injury. I should be super careful when driving or playing sports or going outside in general. And I should expect some increased mental health issues thanks to my career problems!

So…anyone know the name of a good lawyer?

If you want to see how you’ll fair in 2017, click here to find your own horoscope. Share your results in the comments!

Thanks for reading 🙂